HELL, it’s all too easy for some moderns to look at Greek, Inuit, Hindu, Viking, or anyone else’s myths and dismiss their stories as the workings of unsophisticated minds. What I got from my Latin class in High School was a validation for believing in the superiority of my beliefs. After all, Venus was the Goddess in a mythical pagan pantheon and Jesus, the Son of God, a historical fact. To step out of one’s own myth and scrutinize it with equal veracity is not something I would recommend for the feint of heart.
My stepping-out started in college. Having moved away from my family to another state, I found myself going to church less and less. I knew this back-sliding was not acceptable in my circle, but things had started to unravel in my thinking. Ideas were fomenting my brain i.e. General Sherman was not as revered as I’d been led to think by the North American history book used in the public school I attended (I have a gr-grandfather who was in Sherman’s Ohio army and my college was in TN), OR the planet might be older than the 6,012 years I was taught in Bible School as fact, OR could it be the Garden of Eden story was just another myth like Pygmalion and Galatea?
During this period a trippy event happened to me, while sleeping soundly in bed one Sunday morning. A large clap of thunder vibrated my dwelling, and I nearly convulsed onto the floor. My body seemed to have a mind of its own. Lightening was not the culprit. Fear shook my bones. I was afraid of being cast into the fiery pit of Hell for all of eternity. My entire being felt the second coming of Christ and the onset of Judgement Day. A hologram of the event appeared all around me in living color with fiery dragons and seven-headed beasts. Withdrawal is rarely a smooth transition—and this was B.D.E. (Before Drug Experimentation). Somehow I survived this crash. Working as an actress on stage at the time helped me navigate this adventure. In the process of analyzing and portraying another person, I started to analyze myself–an ongoing process to this day 🙂
Along the way I decided to search for the root of this addiction to myth, and not fall into the trap of replacing the big hole in my heart and brain with more useless babble, or mind numbing addictions. (OK I admit it – I’m addicted to coffee and sugar) Some in my current circle might say I took up with Juno. “If I cannot sway the Gods above, I’ll stir up Hell.” (Virgil – Aeneid, VII.312).
All this led me to Mary, who represents the female aspect missing or maligned in the Jesus story. For all the arguments about how inclusive Christianity is, I have yet to see it realized in any society or historical events.
I regret not getting more of my writing in print before the media splash of The Da Vinci Code, so as to seem more of a leader than a follower (my hero journey), but que sera sera…
Utor Mens!
thank you for this…i’m a recovering catholic, same kinda feelings